Log in

No account? Create an account
09 December 2007 @ 08:53 pm
Numb3rs Fic: A Passing Resemblance  
Written for numb3rs100 Challenge #136 – Resemblance

Title: A Passing Resemblance
Pairing/Characters: Charlie
Rating: PG13
Word Count: 300
Spoilers: UP
Summary: It's been three weeks and two days when he sees her at the supermarket
Notes/Warnings: Read the disclaimer on my LJ

And just like that there's no air.

His head spins like a dreidel, dizzying like Hanukkah excitement with presents and Don actually playing with him and she's there smiling...

His knees threaten to buckle and he blindly puts out a hand, seeking something - anything - to ground him. His fingers brush a passing stroller, earning a soccer mom's icy glare.

A store employee lays a gentle hand on his arm and asks if he's okay. The voice sounds like it's bouncing around in a fishbowl and the noise inside Charlie's head that's nothing like the sound of numbers he's used to and all about the oh god oh god oh god is rising, deafening.

She smiles and curls he knows as well as his own bounce as she nods yes plastic is fine.

It's been three weeks and two days and Charlie knows this, knows this with the certainty he knows pi. This woman now heading his way - this doppelganger - is not his mother, but the aching rush of longing in his chest flares regardless.

It's just a passing resemblance, he sees that now, but he watches her go - pretending it's her just for the brief respite that wishful thinking offers him.

He winds up back in his car, helped there by the kindly employee, whatever he came for long forgotten.

He has to sit there for a long while, first choking back tears then surrendering to them.

When he comes home empty-handed his father doesn't scold, just gets his car keys and goes out for whatever it was he'd asked Charlie to pick up.

He's had the same red-rimmed eyes himself and he gets it even if Charlie doesn't as he sits in the solarium staring at the empty chalkboards wondering when she's coming home.

Emma DeMarais: BlueEyeemmademarais on December 10th, 2007 04:55 am (UTC)
I know quite a few people for whom this fandom resonates because they've lost someone they love the same way Charlie has.

I'm one of them.

I had thought about putting more emotion into my fic next year, but with Margaret as the Challenge Character this month at N100 it felt right to let some of that grief I feel this time each year out in my fic.

I confess I know that's not the proper spelling for the female version of a doppelganger, but it's the word Charlie would know so I let it stand.

My family has a doppelganger story and while I wasn't there to see them, it ended up that the experience was actually a positive one - thus me including that tiny bit about the respite Charlie feels while he's pretending it's her. It reminded me of Our Town, but this being a drabble (whose first version was over 400 words gah!) there wasn't a chance in hell I was going to fit in that complex of a reference and have it make sense.

So to those of you missing someone this holiday season, my thoughts are with you...

Very special thanks to beta melissima for her assistance with this fic.


Emma DeMarais
rodloxrodlox on February 6th, 2008 02:27 pm (UTC)
Re: Confession
there was never a more potent and damnable curse than the harmless-sounding "everyone has a twin".

lovely drabble...and 400 words wouldn't be a bad thing.
Emma DeMaraisemmademarais on February 7th, 2008 03:00 am (UTC)
Re: Confession
Only a bad thing in that I co-mod the N100 comm so I can't break my own rule and go over 300!

In the past when I had drabbles that were great longer I offered them up to friends via email figuring at least someone gets to enjoy them other than me. Drabbles like this? Less about enjoying...

And yeah, the twin thing is find if both are living and either never meet or meet under good circumstances.

I was told over and over in high school I looked *just* like this other girl. I never met her, but I really got tired of hearing the comparison. Made me feel less unique as a human being, which I didn't appreciate.

Thanks for your lovely comment!
rodloxrodlox on February 7th, 2008 03:13 am (UTC)
Re: Confession
that's what "TBC" is for.

you're very welcome.
Emma DeMaraisemmademarais on February 7th, 2008 03:16 am (UTC)
Re: Confession
AKA Drabble *series* /grins/
Jelsemiumjelsemium on December 10th, 2007 05:05 am (UTC)

Poor Charlie, I know exactly how he feels. A few weeks after my godfather died, I could have sworn I saw him at a restaurant.

You did a great job of capturing that moment.
irena_adler: Margaretirena_adler on December 10th, 2007 05:50 am (UTC)
Very powerful. I'm sure there are many of us that share your grief at this time of the year.
fredbassettfredbassett on December 10th, 2007 07:00 pm (UTC)
Anniversaries and times like Christmas always throw past losses into sharp relief, so yes, I know how you feel/ Powerful story, well written as always.
telperion_15: Charlietelperion_15 on December 10th, 2007 08:22 pm (UTC)
Lovely story, hon *hugs*

I think people can forget that sometimes Christmas is time for sadness as well as joy. Although I hope that there's more of latter than the former for everyone.
rubynye: Star In Hand (papervolcano)rubynye on October 7th, 2008 06:30 pm (UTC)
This is well and beautifully written. And oh, my heart, I'm choking back tears.
Emma DeMaraisemmademarais on October 7th, 2008 07:13 pm (UTC)
Oh, I am made of 11 kinds of fail! /hangs head/

The better part of a year later and I *just* now saw that I forgot to code the italics into this fic! /facepalm/ I'm am so lame. Argh.

/goes to fix/

This is my drive by fic, inflicting so much pain and grief in so few words. It's meant to resonate with anyone who has had this happen - and anyone who has a human heart.

I love writing drabbles that make people feel.

Thank you for sharing how this touched you.