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29 September 2013 @ 11:59 pm
Numb3rs Fic: Relapse Revenge  
Written for numb3rs100 Challenge #439 - Relapse

Title: Relapse Revenge
Pairing/Characters: Ian, David, Colby, Nikki, Liz
Rating: PG13
Word Count: 300
Spoilers: Pilot, Sniper Zero, Judgment Call, Blackout, High Exposure
Summary: Ian's not as scary when he's sick
Notes/Warnings: Read the disclaimer on my LJ

Ian opened his eyes to white, white, more white and most of Don's team staring back at him.

Cursing under his breath, he forced himself to sit up under their scrutiny.

"I heard that," Nikki scoffed. "You best not be swearing at us for taking care of you after you went and crashed all over the conference room floor on us."

"Dude, you could have told us you were sick." Colby's voice was a bit kinder in tone, but still accusatory.

"Yeah, Don wasn't too happy to have to find out from your AD back at Quantico that you'd already been in the hospital for this," David added.

Ian went to scrub his face with his hands in exasperation only to find his left wrist shackled to the hospital bed with a handcuff.

"What the..."

"Don's idea," Liz smirked as she pointed to the cuffs. "His words, 'No way is he getting out of that bed!'"

Ian let out a huff of air.

"And how am I supposed to go to the bathroom?"


"Not my problem, man," Colby said on his way out.

"Ditto," David added, following his partner out.

"I'm not taking on a world class sniper!" Nikki put up her hands and started to back away towards the door.

"I'm not pissing off the boss!" Liz added, joining her.

"Wait!" Ian yelled as the two headed out the door.

"Don't worry," Liz called back as the door slowly closed behind her. "I'll send in a nurse... with a key... after we're a safe distance away."

"I'm a sniper," he grumbled to himself in the now empty room. "Screw Don. There's no safe distance from me..." He jangled the cuff ineffectually. "Once I get out of here that is."

lilacs_roseslilacs_roses on October 1st, 2013 01:52 am (UTC)
ROFLMFBO!! Oh I loved this!! Well done :)

And, BTW, I liked your explanation for what/where Ian was with the last drabble :) (It's hard for me to get places from other places on this tablet so... Hope you don't mind.)
melissima: Garcia Laughsmelissima on October 1st, 2013 06:34 am (UTC)
Heeee! I can't believe they handcuffed him to the bed and left him. Evil. :D

So funny!
Andreadizzydrea on October 1st, 2013 05:14 pm (UTC)

That was simply perfect!
ladygray99ladygray99 on January 8th, 2014 04:34 am (UTC)
I fucking bet Don was pissed.