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10 June 2007 @ 04:01 pm
Numb3rs Fic: Almost  
Written for eppescest Summer Porn Challenge – Rampage
Crossposted to numb3rs_slash


Title: Almost
Pairing/Characters: Don/Charlie
Rating: NC17
Spoilers: Rampage
Summary: After a close call Don and Charlie feel the need to be close
Notes/Warnings: Read the disclaimer on my LJ


It's well after midnight when Charlie finally speaks the words aloud. They've been pulsing through his head for hours now, the pressure building since the idea coalesced, malignant and terrible in his troubled mind.

"I almost died today."

They lay in Don's bed, rumpled from several bouts of desperate lovemaking, spooned together on their sides with Don's arm slung protectively across Charlie's torso. That arm tenses, tightens its hold, as the sentiment echoes within Don - not that he'd almost died as well, but that he'd almost lost Charlie.

"I won't let you die," he soothes, shifting closer, skin brushing against skin as he nestles his face in Charlie's hair, inhaling the familiar scent and exhaling only a tiny bit of the warring tension within.

"You can't always protect me."

The words ring out in the empty air, not meant as an accusation but a frightening realization. In the silence that follows Don doesn't even try to protest, he just shrinks back to his side of the bed, acknowledging the failure he's spent the last couple of hours trying to erase from the burned in image behind his eyes.

"Don't go."

Charlie's hand reaches blindly behind him, fingers outstretched, seeking until they brush against Don's hip. He nudges the warm body behind him back where it belongs.

"Come back."

Dutifully Don slides forward a little, still distracted by the misery of his memory.

"Closer. I need you closer."

The insistence of the hand pulling him nearer and the undertone of need in Charlie's voice rousts him from his reverie. He folds himself around his lover - full contact - and returns his arm to its rightful place of protection.

Charlie takes hold of the arm and tucks it into his chest, curling around it and placing his own arm over it to hold it in place, as if this is enough to make Don stay.

They lay like that in the quiet hush, both struggling with their rampant thoughts and finding solace in the bond unbroken they feel between them.

Charlie lets out a sigh that is equal parts wistful and wanting.

"I can't seem to get close enough to you."

Don hears the words unspoken and knows what his brother wants, needs, is asking for. It hasn't been that long since the last time and he wonders if he can until Charlie, impatient, rubs back against him. He needs little encouragement it seems to raise his interest again and Charlie is still slick from before. He slips his thigh between his lover's legs, rubbing slowly against the cleft of his ass until he's fully ready.

Charlie reluctantly lets his arm go and bends forward slightly as Don moves his hand to his hip to hold him in place.

He slips inside so slowly, so effortlessly, it takes a moment for him to realize he's holding his breath.

It isn't until Charlie takes a breath that he realizes he was too.

He pushes the rest of the way in then pulls Charlie back up even as he curls around him.

Pressed up against each other, intimately entwined... This is the connection they needed.

There is nothing closer.

At first it suffices, then Don can't help but start to circle his hips ever so slightly. Tiny movements, but each one sends an electric shiver through Charlie as it brushes against the spot inside that shuts down his overactive brain, that frequency that he vibrates to sympathetically - in tune with Don, in tune with the universe.

Don's fingers caress Charlie's hip until he keens softly, aching for more touch, more pleasure. His hand dips down, the flat of his palm cupping the head of Charlie's cock. Each circling motion pushes him into Don's hand, the slight slickness there spreading as Don swirls his palm in mirror circles, applying only a hint of pressure.

Circles give way to shallow thrusts. Soft pants give way to gasps. Anxious minds yield to peace, desperate bodies yield to desire.

As the end draws near, Don closes his fist, encircling Charlie in his tender grip even as his languid pace speeds, strengthens. Charlie's frame goes taut, rocked by dual sensation, and he spasms helplessly under Don's control.

The delicious tension is too much for Don. Charlie clenching around him drives all coherent motion from his muscle memory and raw instinct takes over. Gracelessly he drives inside once, twice more then turns himself over to the inevitable euphoria that leaves him gray around the edges and lax from exertion.

Still joined, they breathe together, unconsciously in tandem, in harmony, in sync.

Respiration slows, fingers intertwine lovingly and sleep claims them before memory can reclaim them with evil intent.

They do not dream.

It is a rare gift they give each other.

Peace of mind.

Peace.

=
 
 
 
Emma DeMarais: BlueEyeemmademarais on June 10th, 2007 11:13 pm (UTC)
Confession
I have been trying some new things this year: signing up for ficathons and such as well as posting to more and smaller comms. I love fic and write a lot of it, but I really dislike the actual work of publishing. Writing headers is like pulling teeth for me. My betas have seen me struggle to come up with a summary line for a fic - sometimes spending far longer on that than the fic itself! I have also spent time laboriously checking facts to make sure my spoilers are accurate. Some comms require specific headers as well so I spend time making sure I have the right headers for that comm.

So this is my inaugural post at eppescest. Clearly I support the pairing /points to tons of Eppescest on this LJ/ but I had to fight down my self-imposed rule of posting at the fewest comms possible to manage it. I took the plunge and signed up for 5 episode prompts for their Summer Porn Challenge figuring that would help me jump in and get my feet wet.

Part of the reason why I am doing this is because the people behind many of these newer comms are people I know and like and who have supported my fic over time. I wanted to show my support in turn. I switched my het fic posting to numb3rs_het because sororcula runs it, I did some comment porn at numb3rswom3n for leda_speaks. I started trying to write more Larry/Megan because of philleegirland jestana and the comm. white_tuberoses. So now I am trying to support neur0vanityand the comm eppescest as well. I figure after the brouhaha with LJ if there was any time to support cest fic comms, it's now.

This fic is another one of my experiments where I try to put aside my specialty of dialogue and attempt more descriptive writing. To me any paragraph longer than two lines is a coup. Go me! LOL! It didn't result in a super descriptive fic, but I think the results are stylistically different enough that I consider the experiment to have helped me move forward a tiny bit in my effort to expand my writing ability beyond my comfort zone.

FWIW, my biggest concern was if I could pull off third person omniscient. I guess I have written so much fic from a single or alternating POV I had kind of forgotten how *not* to have a human POV. Huh. Clearly I need to sign up for a writing class. /grins/

Very special thanks to beta melissima for her assistance with this fic.

Thanks,

Emma DeMarais
One Part Exuberance; Two Parts Obsession: all smilespenguingal on June 11th, 2007 03:39 am (UTC)
Re: Confession
LOVELY! *applauds*
Re: Confession - emmademarais on June 11th, 2007 07:54 am (UTC) (Expand)
Re: Confession - tiddletat666 on June 11th, 2007 03:42 am (UTC) (Expand)
Re: Confession - emmademarais on June 11th, 2007 07:55 am (UTC) (Expand)
Re: Confession - philleegirl on June 12th, 2007 02:45 am (UTC) (Expand)
charleseppescharleseppes on June 11th, 2007 12:49 am (UTC)
Hot hot hot! I love it!
Emma DeMarais: BlueEyeemmademarais on June 11th, 2007 08:03 am (UTC)
Thanks! Though I admit it unnerves me a little to have 'Charles Eppes' tell me an Eppescest fic is hot! LOL!
No one understanding doesn't make you an Artist: numb3rs loveslashybits on June 11th, 2007 03:24 am (UTC)
That was lovely *happy sigh*
Emma DeMarais: BlueEyeemmademarais on June 11th, 2007 08:04 am (UTC)
Thanks! I'm so glad you liked it!
Abbie Strehlow: Sleepingknotted_rose on June 11th, 2007 03:56 am (UTC)
I liked this. I think it was a successful experiment. Thanks for sharing!
Emma DeMarais: BlueEyeemmademarais on June 11th, 2007 08:06 am (UTC)
Yay! Thanks!

I do hope that not all of my experiments turn out unfit for human consumption. ;-) Some of them are rather unfortunate, but I think this one turned out worth sharing and I did get something out of it. /smiles/
NV: [n3] eppescest // on my mindneur0vanity on June 11th, 2007 07:16 am (UTC)
It is a rare gift they give each other.

Peace of mind.

Peace.


*happy sigh* Such a beautiful ending to a lovely fic. Thanks for writing this and supporting the comm.
Emma DeMarais: BlueEyeemmademarais on June 11th, 2007 08:11 am (UTC)
yw

You have supported mine so much, it only makes sense. I figure between the two of us we keep this fandom in regular fic so I should make the effort to pump up your comm with at least those 5 fic.
andi: Don & Charlie hugadmiralandrea on June 11th, 2007 08:34 am (UTC)
This is so achingly beautiful. I love your description in it and the slow pace it moves at. It's very languid and loving. Thank you!
Emma DeMarais: BlueEyeemmademarais on June 11th, 2007 09:07 pm (UTC)
Thanks! It makes me happy to get that sort of reaction from an experiment!

I forgot to say so in my Confession /headdesk/ but I had some inspiration from the Oleta Adams song Get Here. It has the lyric 'I need you closer' in it.

I think I figured that most people would assume post-ep sex for Rampage would be that sort of desperate 'OMG! We almost died!' sort of thing, but I felt like even though that's what would have happened at first it wouldn't provide them what they ultimately needed. They needed to feel that connection longer, stronger, in order to calm back down again.

I had a beta tell me once that fast/hard doesn't always equate with good IRL so to try writing slow sex. I find it's a lot harder to write, but at least the goal with this fic was less to turn people on and more to tune them in to what Don and Charlie were feeling.

Bah! This is turning into Confession Part Deux! LOL!

Thanks again for your lovely comment!
(no subject) - admiralandrea on June 12th, 2007 08:06 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - emmademarais on June 12th, 2007 08:19 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - admiralandrea on June 12th, 2007 08:23 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - emmademarais on June 12th, 2007 08:56 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - admiralandrea on June 12th, 2007 10:03 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - emmademarais on June 12th, 2007 05:32 pm (UTC) (Expand)
melissimamelissima on June 11th, 2007 06:03 pm (UTC)
:sigh.: So beautiful. I really love this fic for several reasons but the biggest reason is that it focuses on the part of the "life-affirming sex" scenario that readers rarely get to see--the panic and urgency have dissipated, the characters are exhausted, but the need and the intimacy hang in the air like a sweet fragrance. Peace, indeed--both rare and lovely.

Thank you.

Emma DeMaraisemmademarais on June 11th, 2007 09:15 pm (UTC)
Aww... Reading this makes me so happy... /squishes you/

I was sure people would expect the urgent 'can barely get the door closed before we start stripping each other' sort of post-ep sex for Rampage given what happened, but somehow the muse wanted something different. (One hopes we will still get that from whomever is writing post-ep for Sniper Zero. Hehehe)

The down side - in my mind at least - of all that frantic sex is that it is over too fast. After all of it Charlie is still craving the feeling of connectedness. I tried to focus on that instead of titillation in the hopes of giving this PWP some depth. (Hey I know the whole challenge is about porn, but I like tweaking the boundaries whenever possible. /grins/)

BTW, how jealous am I that your *comment* comes off as nicely written as the fic I worked so hard on. /pouts/

These experiments better pay off. I keep getting shown up by you and Ley! /makes mocking mad face/ /can't hold that mean face and giggles/
(no subject) - melissima on June 11th, 2007 09:20 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - emmademarais on June 11th, 2007 10:55 pm (UTC) (Expand)
pinkdoom on June 12th, 2007 02:03 am (UTC)
Wow, this was amazingly sweet and hot at the same time! I read your note at the bottom of this fic, and I must say, for someone who focuses on dialogue, you did a great job with the descriptions here. I'm a detail-whore, and I always warn those whose fics I beta that I'll probably bug them for more and more detail, without bogging the fic down.

My favorite line: "I won't let you die," he soothes, shifting closer, skin brushing against skin as he nestles his face in Charlie's hair, inhaling the familiar scent and exhaling only a tiny bit of the warring tension within

I'm a very textile person, and this spooke to both my sense of touch and smell...that line came alive. :)
pinkdoom on June 12th, 2007 02:08 am (UTC)
*spoke* Can't spell, apparently! ;)
Valerie: Sharon/Helo-My very own Helo?galadrielriver on June 17th, 2007 05:07 am (UTC)
*gushes* Ohhhh....

Very beautiful, I just love the way you write them.

Just when I thought I was almost out of this fandom, it's been like FOREVER, since I've seen an ep and I finally saw the finale and then I read one of your fics and hello.

Sucked. Right. Back. In.

*grins stupidly* I luff you.
flowergal19 on April 18th, 2008 01:35 am (UTC)
So I finally joined this community after months of lurking and its time to make up for not commenting. I love this story it is so sweet and desperate and you can just feel the pain they are both feeling. I love the connection and the description I love this story :)
Emma DeMaraisemmademarais on April 18th, 2008 08:11 am (UTC)
Thank you and congratulations on delurking! Really, LJ can be a very friendly and fun place if you just comment enough to get into conversations with people. This is really where you get to know people - in commentversations. I felt kind of disconnected when I just wrote and said thank you to comments. Now I know people well enough to engage them here and really enjoy the interaction.

I hope you keep reading and commenting and really hope you'll come join numb3rs100. We have all sorts of good N3 fic there, all in bite size pieces. Check it out!

Thanks for reading and commenting on my fic. Enjoy the other ~400 stories!
(no subject) - flowergal19 on April 18th, 2008 02:52 pm (UTC) (Expand)
Maria: Megan&Shia kissthepuppeteer on January 31st, 2009 05:24 pm (UTC)
Lovely. <3 Very romantic and a little bit disturbing with Charlie almost dying *cries*